Humor is our way of defending ourselves from life's absurdities by thinking absurdly about them. ~~Lewis Mumford

Life is settling down a bit for me, my daughter and I are getting into a new routine. And starting a new life together. The dust has settled for us, and we are enjoying a newly found calm, peace, and serenity in our home. But we don't live in a monastery, there is also plenty of laughter for us.

I think if my mother were still alive she would be pleased with our progress. She was a person who could find humor in almost any situation, and it certainly helped her to cope with life. I am thinking about all of this because I asked my son, who chose to live with his dad, if they were ever laughing at what was going on. His unsurprising answer: No. And for that I'm really sorry. My son is one of the (two) funniest people I've ever known, the other being my daughter. I can't imagine how stultifying it must be living with his father during this whole upheaval. Which, of course, is one of the reasons why I'm at the crossroads I am at now. I have to have some humor and laughter in my life- my husband is one of the most unfunny people I've ever known. I know it's not entirely his fault, I think it must be how he was raised, his mother's most 'humorous' joke is 'call me anything, but don't call me late for dinner.' Yup. She is a dear woman, but humor is just not her forte.

So, for years I had to live with that kind of humor as a baseline for day to day living. I guess that is why I'm really attracted to funny people. I certainly never married one. My oldest brother was my first foray into the funny side of life. He could make me laugh so hard that I'd wet my pants, or get hiccups. And even now we have the amazing ability to just say a word or two to each other and start the guffaws, it doesn't take much with us. When I listen to my son I wonder how he came to such an absurd view of life; he has this off-center way of looking at the reality of the universe, but is still quite funny and on target, too. I love him and his humor.

My daughter is much like I was when I was young. She lives in her own world and loves to make fun of the characters that inhabit her imagination. The great part is that she lets me in on her fun- her imagination is great, and her humor reflects her creativity constantly. She has tended to deal with all of our family's problems with humor and grace, lending a true light heart to what is really a dour situation at times. It is this outlook that has helped me to remember what is really important to me, the love and laughter of my family is intertwined in my life.

It is this gift of humor that I find to be one of the most precious gifts that we as humans can have. I know that in my case I tend to use it to envelope myself in, it protects me and shields me from so much that is hurtful. Life is hard enough as it is, and humor is just a basic coping mechanism. But, it is certainly one that I am quite happy to use on a daily basis, and right now I find that I'm using it more than ever. Good thing it doesn't ever wear out.